90scherry:

(via arthurmorgansbride)

mexicanalesbiana:

zenja-soba:

Me, at my gamer funeral, on my gamer deathbead: *Is dead.*

Priest: “My fellow gamers, today we press F, but from here on….”

Crowd: *crying*

Priest ”:..We must press W, and move forward.”

(via reqsketch)

katielittlejohn:

soorajmakhi:

theyellowbrickroad:

theyellowbrickroad:

Did I ever tell u guys about the time my ex legitimately thought he killed me with his dick???

Ok so picture this I’m 18 and excited about sex, trying out some new positions. We are having sex in a pretty similar position to this

And my pussy is so wet it might as well be a god damn Slip N Slide ok. And he’s pounding at it fast and hard but slips out and goes to go right back in… But something is wrong. He’s about to enter….

The. Wrong. Hole.

And my eyes widen, I go to shout “noooo!!!!” But it’s all happening too fast. He thrusts right into my unlubed asshole and I scream like murder and leap right up onto my feet.

We had only been dating a couple of months at this time and there was something very important he did not know about me: I am a chronic fainter. If I’m in pain or if I see my own blood, I will pass the fuck out. I get real quiet and turn to him and say, “I am going to pass out.”

He doesn’t know I’m serious, he thinks I’m just being emotional, and he’s like “no baby come here” but as he finishes that sentence i faint and my head ping pongs off my metal bed frame, onto the wall and then finally my whole body falls on the ground.

He has never seen anybody faint before and naturally assumes I’m dead. A couple minutes later I awaken to him sobbing into my naked chest. Like this motherfucker really thought he sent me to the grave with some accidental anal sex.

SIMONE I AM YELLING

Joining tumblr was worth it just to read this. I didn’t make a terrible mistake 9 years ago, after all.

(via confirmance)

heywriters:

yeahwriters:

writeworld:

randomfanficwritingtips:

Avoid using semi-colons in fiction. Break the sentence into two instead.

Nah, dude. Nah.

If you think you should avoid using semicolons, then you don’t know how to use semicolons. Let me help you with that. 

• Punctuation Made Simple: The Semicolon
• GrammarGirl: Semicolons
• Punctuation: The Semicolon
• The Guide to Grammar and Writing: The Semicolon
• Virtual Salt: Using Semicolons
• Writer’s Relief: Three Essential Semicolon Rules
• GrammarBook: Semicolon
• Purdue Owl Online Writing Lab: Commas vs. Semicolons in Compound Sentences
• Writer’s Web: Using Semicolons
• The Week: In defense of the semicolon
• Grammar-Monster: Merge Two Sentences with a Semicolon
• The Writer’s Handbook: Using Semicolons
• Instead of Comma Splices

-C

^

I started using semicolons when I saw some master writers use them expertly. I HATED how my writing sounded with either super long contrived sentences mixed with abrupt split sentences. Semi-colons were the savior I had to level-up to know how to use; em dashes too.

(via shangela-stormborn)

drrockbell:

“Scoob, like we gotta fight the homunculi man!”

(via megacrustle)